How does Counselling work? What can I expect from Counselling?

Your Relationship

When you love someone you invest on many levels including emotionally, physically, materially, with home, children and with time.

This investment is like an invisible bank account you and your partner open and maintain together.

At first when in love both partners usually invest freely and have lots of time for each other. This mutual giving creates "credit" in your relationship account.

This credit can help sustain you both through drains on the relationship (stresses, strains and crises).

Prolonged stress can deplete the account and leave you feeling in the red.

You might feel you are trying to invest but you think your partner has stopped giving.

You might wonder if you should close the account or worry your partner might.

People talk about "cutting their losses" when they contemplate ending their investment in long term relationships.

This can be an emotional rollercoaster time for you both. It can be a fearful time, when you worry if the relationship will survive, particularly as you feel you have invested heavily in it.

Life will deliver problems and all relationships will be challenged by times of crises and change.

How you negotiate these stress times can indicate how strong or resilient your relationship is. Troubles, while testing your relationship, can strengthen your bond.

Counselling can help you get back in touch with your coping and resilience. It can help you work on the trust and hope you can build a healthy account which feels safer for you. It can help you decide if it is time to close the account.

Relationship focussed work can be done on an individual basis or together but the focus will always be on the bit between you - your relationship.